Friday, April 25, 2008

This week's Sabbath School lesson: Jesus the teacher

Roy Adams has been kidnapped!

Nothing else explains this week's lesson -- a lesson in which one of the Adventist Review's best writers and editors supposedly asked us to imagine "millions drooling in the palm of our hand."

As the members of my Freshman Bible class would say upon reading this, "Ewwww!!!"

Then too, Roy knows how to write a Sabbath School lesson that we can actually teach; he's proven this in previous weeks. But this week's lesson boils down to the idea that "Jesus was a great teacher -- and that means he taught a lot of great stuff."

And as any self-respecting Sabbath School teacher would say upon being asked to teach such a vapid lesson, "Arggghhh!!!"

So . . . given the discrepancy between this week's lesson and the kind of thing Roy Adams would actually write, it's clear that:
  • He's been kidnapped.
  • his attackers have attempted to conceal their perfidious crime by hiring an imposter to write this week's Sabbath School lesson,
  • and it's time to unleash the All-Adventist Ninja Strike Force so they can find Roy and bring him home to write a proper Sabbath School lesson -- one we could actually teach.
Meanwhile, I'd suggest you focus on one aspect of the Sermon on the Mount -- the Beatitudes, say, or the Lord's Prayer . . .
  • but focus on that one, specific, manageable chunk of text,
  • develop its meaning,
  • and ask the members of your class how they could apply it to their lives in the coming week.
Meanwhile, we need to pray for Roy's safe return -- and we can only hope he does so before next week's lesson!

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